5 Big Mistakes Women Make With Their Outfits

There is a multitude of reasons women to choose to wear certain outfits. Sometimes the reason is based on identity and self-worth (more on this in a separate post), other times it’s a decision rooted in the plethora of information we see about style, fashion, and the latest trends. It can also be a societal norm or weight gain or loss. No matter the motive, sometimes dressing authentically can feel overwhelming, which can lead to some big style mistakes. Out of the many I’ve seen, here are a few major style faux pas I see women make all the time. Buckle up, it’s about to get deep.  

1. Wearing oversized, baggy, or overly “comfortable” clothes

In my opinion, this is the worst offender because it’s the highest form of blending in.

But let’s back up for a second. What’s wrong with blending in? Our desire to feel accepted, loved, and needed by others is deeply human, valuable, and inherently good. However, when women consistently wear sweatpants or saggy clothes that don’t shape or flatter, there’s a bigger problem at play. Instead of displaying our feminie bodies and internal gifts, these types of clothes detract from the whole person. In public, they can showcase a sense of shame about the wearer. This shame could stem from a feeling of unworthiness, low self-esteem or confidence, not knowing how to dress a body as it is, or not wanting attention for some other reason. As women, oftentimes our sense of identity and worth is deeply tied to appearance. The saggy clothes say to others, “I’ve given up. I don’t want you to see me. If I dress up, the world will see me for who I am. And what if that isn’t good enough?”

Clothes are meant to make us feel good about ourselves, not for us to hide in.

2. Wearing just the basics

The second big mistake is what I like to call, “just the basics.” This type of outfit screams, “I put zero effort in today. These clothes were in my closet so I put them on. Why does it matter anyway?”

This is also a type of blending in. Rather than adding a few more style elements, those of us who choose to wear only basics have simply accepted that wearing jeans and a tee is an acceptable standard. These are the types of women that don’t consider themselves “fashionable” and would rather focus on something else. They get lost or bogged down in trends, so rather than keep up with changing looks or finding their true style, they settle for a few basic items that fit right within their comfort zone (even if the clothes don’t actually fit their bodies).

Do not get me wrong, everyone’s style is different and many women fall into the fabulous “classic” or “natural” style types. No matter what the style personality is, we all have things to accomplish each day and choosing an outfit in the morning shouldn’t take long, basics or not. Building the right wardrobe with pieces that are reflective of a woman’s personality will save time in the morning.

Basic items are key to every closet. But so are layering pieces, the right shoes, and accessories. It takes a color palette to create a beautiful painting. So too, does it take multiple items to complete a look that is a definitive display of the whole person wearing the clothes.

3. Wearing poorly fitted clothes

I shift some blame on the fashion industry for this one. Since we were little kids, we have been told (by our peers, the media, Hollywood) that we would grow up and fit into a certain size and look like a certain model. Guess what? It is pretty damn depressing when that does not happen. What do retail companies do to compensate? They tell us we must fit into their pre-determined sizes based on what we might look like. Now that’s some BS.  

But the fashion industry isn’t the only culprit here. Sure, some women can fit perfectly into clothes right off the rack. And with today’s casual trends, that is especially true. However, for the rest of us it’s not always so easy. How many times do we have to walk out of a dressing room practically in tears blaming our bodies for the poorly fitted clothes instead of empowering ourselves with the mindset that we have beautiful bodies and the pieces just need to be tailored? We are the masterpieces clothes should fit on; clothing should not act as the mold that we should fit into. Women often purchase and wear clothes that have sleeves that are too long, a dress that fits their butt but has plenty of space for extra boobs that don’t exist, pants that are too long, and the list goes on. Micro-touch ups from tailoring make a macro difference in an outfit. It’s time to take ownership and find a good tailor.   

4. Wearing athleisure as a suitable replacement for anything other than it is: gym clothes

Note: I did not say athleisure isn’t trendy. I believe it isn’t a suitable replacement for every day wear. I love a good athletic moment, but do not show me a woman in hundreds of dollars worth of athletic wear and expect me to be impressed by her outfit. It’s not the same as a woman dressed in well-fitted jeans, great pointed toe flats, and a beautifully cut blouse. This is a hot topic button for many, and there will be haters who read this post. That’s ok. Simply put, if you can sweat in an item at an Orangetheory class, it shouldn’t also be worn to the bar (unless of course you’re hitting up happy hour after class).

5. Wearing clothes that accentuate the wrong body parts

This is a sneaky mistake. Naturally, we look to current trends and widely-held beliefs about women’s fashion to buy new clothes or style a new look. But not every trend or look is meant to enhance the uniqueness of every woman’s body. The most obvious example of this is when women who do not have an A-frame or hourglass figure accentuate their waist because they think it’s what they are supposed to do to balance their shape. What if a woman wants to show off her curves but carries weight in her bust or mid-section? What if she is pregnant? What do you do then? These are questions the fashion industry isn’t equipped to answer. Remember, the industry exists to make money, not to empower us with the knowledge to build the right looks for our bodies. That’s our job.

When accentuating parts of your body with clothes, think about the features you love about yourself and want to show off. Do not buy into the notion that you have to be a stick-thin model or Kardashian curvy to feel feminine, confident, and beautiful.

Conclusion

Being overwhelmed or self-conscious can lead to the feeling of loss of control, knowledge gaps about what to wear, or even wardrobe despair. I have seen this feeling manifested in many ways through women’s outfit choices, just not what is articulated above. The wonderful news is that what we wear is a choice. We can choose to lift ourselves up through style or tear ourselves down. The choice is ours. When we see ourselves as higher, more vibrant versions of ourselves, we slowly come to believe we can be the person we see in the mirror every day. Sometime seeing is truly believing.